Featured books

Distancing: Avoidant Personality Disorder

Disorders of Personality: DSM and Beyond, 2nd edition

Dialectical Behavior Therapy in Clinical Practice

Mindfulness and Acceptance

Transforming Anxiety, Transcending Shame

A Guide to Rational Living

Party of One

The Highly Sensitive Person

The Introvert Advantage

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If you would like to publish your story or experiences about being an avoidant person suffering with social anxieties, Click here.

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Name:      Recluse in use
State:       USA

Story:

I realized that I have APD about 4 years ago.  Now I'm 30(male) and still can't figure out how to improve or break out of this.  I try to remember when it started and I cannot recall anything from my childhood.  I just know that I showed signs at an early age.  Now it is starting to hurt my quality of life. I have a hard time with relationships and I am lonely and feel helpless.  I never open up or show the real me.  I feel I have so much to offer a women, but I can't ever just relax and be myself.  With friends I am a little better, but still put up a wall even with them.  I am simply terrified of being rejected.  There have been countless relationships that I have ended just because I felt she might end it soon anyways.

As I read what can be done to help people like me I realized that we are pretty much on our own.  I've thought about trying the "throw yourself in the fire" method and just facing my scariest social situations head on and not straying no matter what the outcome.  Also, I may try medication, but I don't know if anything will work. 

I fear getting old and realizing that all this fear prevented me from marriage and kids.  If only we could block these fearful thoughts in our brains and just live normal lives. But I will keep searching for cures and if I find one, I will let all you know about it.

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